Ten Ways to Plan a Stress-Free Wedding

It’s your wedding day. On the one hand, there are special magazines and web sites that promote, and sometimes overwhelm you with, helpful hints on how to have the perfect event. On the other hand, there are TV shows that celebrate confused brides and bridezillas, whose DIY plans and entourages of family members only serve to increase stress. What to do?

Seeking an expert’s opinion, About Town sought out wedding/event planner and floral designer Jessica Robinson, owner of Jessica’s Country Flowers, for her input. Robinson offered a practical list, ‘Ten Ways to Plan a Stress-Free Wedding,’ based upon both her business experiences and stories of misadventures from other brides and grooms.

(1) Budget:  Be realistic.

Once you set your budget, add 20 percent for those unforeseen circumstances that are inevitable. Working within a budget will discipline your vendors and focus them on making the very best suggestions they can.

Invite only your very favorite people to the wedding. It’s better to cut the guest list and put those unspent funds into a smaller, better quality, custom designed wedding.

(2) Timing: Be considerate of your guests.

Find a venue that only hosts one wedding per day, so they can be flexible in terms of timing your meal. For a 2 p.m. ceremony, you want to aim for a mid-afternoon meal.  If, instead, your reception begins at 7 p.m. that evening, your guests must find something to do in the five-hour interim. Guests may ultimately choose to skip either the ceremony or reception. Or, they may decide not to attend at all - at the last minute.

(3) Travel: Keep it short.

Keep travel time, from the ceremony venue to the reception site, between 30 to 35 minutes maximum. You want your guests to spend their time and energy with you not fighting traffic, weather, detours, etc. One of the trends we’re seeing is the multi-use venue; where the ceremony and reception take place at one site.     

(4)  Date: Check the calendar. Then check again.

Pay attention to what holidays fall on or near your wedding day. All major holidays – Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentine’s or New Year’s Days – will boost your costs; potentially limit your options; add stress to travel; increase chances of error due to the demands on vendors, etc. Also, double check that your date doesn’t fall on one of the, `Hallmark’ holidays; like Mother’s or Father’s Day.

Weddings held on Friday or Sunday evenings, compete with your guest’s work and/or children’s school schedules and responsibilities.

(5) Food: Think Outside the Box.

No where is it written that you must have a full, sit down dinner. Why not consider a picnic or a brunch? You can host an elegant cocktail party with incredible hors d’oeuvres. Or a rustic, locavore-style supper in a barn. There is also a definite trend towards serving comfort foods: mac and cheese mini muffins; cheese burger sliders; shrimp lollipops.

People are also skipping the wedding cake and instead offering beautiful, hand-crafted pastries and petit fours. A fall wedding could offer a variety of handmade pies, instead of a cake. Whatever you choose, if it reflects your personality and style, and not any one else’s, it will be memorable.

(6) Attire: Fit your style from beginning to end.

Styling a wedding starts with understanding, then articulating what you want the day to represent. Once you have that overall concept, it provides a clear path from which to style the entire event. For example, if you want to get married at the beach because of the atmosphere it provides, a ball gown may not be your best option.   

The trend is towards more colorful weddings, in terms of shoes and flowers. And, veils are getting smaller; more contoured to the face or vintage in style.

(7) Plans: Expect the unexpected.

With so many moving parts that must be coordinated, something will inevitably not go precisely to plan. So, it’s important to develop a back-up, Plan B. Take outdoor weddings, for example. If your site vendor tells you he can provide a Plan B-indoor space, check it out. Your 150 guests may not be able to fit everywhere, despite reassurances.

Order your gown and those of your bridesmaids, way a head of time. Colors that look one shade in the vendor’s fitting room may not necessarily arrive in that same color palette. This can impact the entire color scheme for your wedding.

Reconsider booking any venue that requires or is planning a renovation. If the carpet is tattered or the landscaping looks a mess, expect that nothing will be different on your wedding day; even if verbal promises have been made otherwise. Construction delays are inevitable. You don’t want to get married in a church with scaffolding hanging off the front door. It’s happened.

Weddings are typically a significant investment. Get wedding insurance. Some venues are requiring it to protect themselves against loss. But, it will also protect your investment in the day. In this economy, it’s a good idea.  

(8) Contracts: Get everything in writing.

Know what's in every contract. Read every word and understand it. Ask questions. Some old school venues still seal a deal with a handshake versus a written contract. Don’t do it. If someone says it’s no problem and not to worry, then it should be no problem to put the terms in writing.

(9) Decoration: Know your style.

Have a good idea of the overall look, feel and colors that you’re looking for, but be open to suggestions from the professionals you hire. They will know of many options, in terms of rentals, purchases, etc., that you may not be aware of. By the way, ETSY.com is a popular site for decorative everything for the bride.

(10) Organization: The key to a nearly, flawless wedding day.

Your first purchase should be a binder to collect and organize all your contracts, budget, appointments, itineraries, to do lists, etc. Web sites, such as Knot.com, can also be very helpful.

And finally, either hire an experienced wedding/event planner, or assign a close friend to assist if you act as your own plan coordinator.

Here’s the Deal

Jessica’s Country Flowers, 10 Depot Street, Collinsville; 860-352-2392: www.jesscountryflowers.com.

Jessica’s Country Flowers is running a “Dream Wedding Giveaway,” to celebrate their new Collinsville location. Log on to jesscountryflowers.blogspot.com and see April 1, 2011 for more details. Deadline for applications is June 15, 2011.